Who Am I Now?

Cultivating Joy, Awe and Gratitude

Janet Little
May – Jun 2024 • Vol 4, No 10

New beginnings of spring—a favorite of mine is crocuses, which are in bold gold and royal purple and warm white—in complete overcoming of snow and ice. They survived the winter—outside!

It’s not always as easy to see the new beginning in ourselves. Oh, we may be walking outdoors more, perhaps celebrating sandal weather early by getting a pedicure, maybe throwing balls with kids. Yet, what is new and different in us? How did we survive the snow—or whatever else happened during the winter? What did we learn? How did we grow? Who are we now?

Who am I now? It’s a question I like to ask clients, just to get them thinking. It prompts further inquiries, like what is important to me now, what are my immediate priorities and my long-term ideas? What makes me happy? What do I believe now? What is still true? Are some of the positions I defend outmoded in my own reality? That is, do I really still believe them or was it because I wanted the kids to grow up a certain way? Would my perspective change if I opened up to new research or evidence?

Dye My Hair Indigo? Why Not!

Blessed are those who have the time—or determine to mindfully take the time—to examine their perspectives, to allow the opportunity to modify the constructs or thought- forms that may have given them structure—or imprisoned them. Anything that is about something we’d like to do but ends with the question, “What would people think?” is probably one of those.

Really, why don’t I dye my hair indigo? Follow that train of thought to see what it has to say about who you are now. You may find it’s less about what would people think and more about not desiring the attention, positive and negative, that would result. And there it is—insight into who you are now.

Why don’t I use the pasta attachment that fits the mixer? You might find it’s not about time, or what I’m going to do someday, and more about I don’t care that much, and I really don’t want to clean up the mess. Or I’m gluten-free now. (And that’s a whole other story!) All of which leads naturally then, to why do I keep it?

Now you’re on your way to de-cluttering. And isn’t it easy how you got somewhere you knew you wanted to go—someday. And that day is now! I’m telling you—someday can be now.

Time to Reinvent Who You Are

Asking “Who am I now?” allows us to reinvent ourselves to fit our lives as they are or can be right now. Letting go of a disdain for landscaping gives way to designing a natural, low-maintenance front yard with native plants that you do like. It be-comes a whole new creative pursuit, and maybe even leads to a new friend in the neighborhood who admires the effort.

“Who am I now?” is a good question to ask after any transition—and maybe even during one, when your old situation is like a burning island and everyone on it takes to the water. Whether in a motorboat or a dingy or swimming with the sharks, everyone must leave the island. You haven’t a clue where you’re going, only that you can’t stay where you were. Even then, ask the question.

I am no longer Jason’s partner. I am no longer mom to Max, the golden retriever. I am not now a teacher. Who am I now? You may even re-member that once upon a time, you always thought you were going to be an artist, or a writer, or fly planes—or fly fish!

Embracing the Wonder of It All

In his book, “Awestruck: How Embracing Wonder Can Make You Happier, Healthier and More Connected,” Jonah Paquette PsyD, makes the point that we can cultivate awe, that we can open ourselves to being more awestruck—with nature, at the arts, through social connection, and through habits we can learn and practice.

In Montana, there is no shortage of awe-inspiring scenery, darn-good food, and beautiful works of art. “Who am I now?” makes us ask, “What is my response to the pure magic of this state? Do I revel in the moment and appreciate all that is here? Can I learn to be child-like and open to wonder and awe and the new experiences that God, or the Great Universe, brings to me?”

If the answer is no, then the next question is, “What do I need now?” We may have learned a lot about giving, but have we learned to give to ourselves? The flight attendants are right about the oxygen-mask thing. You know—put yours on first before assisting others. Give yourself the love, the compassion, the smile, and the sleep that you would wish upon another human being.

Once you have given yourself the care you need—and it may take a while—then go find evidences of gratitude. Appreciate the neighborhood cat who somersaults to greet you and to experience the warmth of the sidewalk. Go where you can overhear a tourist exclaiming over a wonder feature of your state, no matter what language they speak. Take responsibility for your own happiness and ask, “Who am I now?”

Visit The Alchemy Exchange store and look up the book, “Happiness,” by Omraam Mikhaël Aïvanhov. Discover the magic of gratitude. Recapture your moments of bliss!

In the Hearts Center Community, we are committed to spiritual practices that support and create true alchemical changes in ourselves first and then outside at large in the greater community. Through meditation and the science of the spoken word (prayers, songs, chants and decrees), we draw upon subtle spiritual energies and technologies as we transform ourselves and our planet. We hold the space of Aquarian Love in our hearts and send it out into the world to bless all of life. Visit: The Hearts Center Community.